Monday, April 16, 2012

TRUST - it's BIG, isn't it?

The Essential Behaviors of TRUST

We all rate trust as a major factor in our satisfaction with personal and professional relationships. But trust is hard-earned and difficult to hold on to especially if it's compromised, isn't it? How many times can you RE-EARN trust - personally or professionally?

For any leader's personal development, TRUST has to top a list of strengths to develop...and maintain.

Effective leadership and management trace success to many factors; but one element of all successful leaders and managers is the ability to develop and maintain a high level of trust. 

With trust you can reach that pinnacle of real teamwork between two individuals or a group of people. Trust works in more than one direction; you want trust between members of the team and between the team and the team leader.

The goal is teamwork.  How to work up to it?
 
Teamwork
 
Trust is elusive and can be difficult to achieve, but it seems to develop through some consistent behaviors that ultimately send the message, “I trust you, you trust me.” 

Not only is trust elusive to capture, but once trust is lost it may NEVER be regained.  So it’s worth understanding what goes into making us trust-worthy.

People tend to trust other people who they can believe in, who they can depend upon and who are reliable.  Also we tend to trust people who we feel care about and respect us.

Teamwork

Trust

  Credibility        Mutual Respect

Those qualities are demonstrated through: (1) mutual respect and (2) credibility. 

But in order to be someone others respect and find credible, three behaviors are required.

These behaviors form the foundation of trust and allow others to view you as credible and worthy of respect.  Respect, of course, is something you earn by your behavior.

Teamwork
Trust
        Credibility       Mutual Respect

1. Stand by Your Word
2. Be Open with Your Thoughts and Feelings
3. Respect the Opinions of Others


1.    Stand by Your Word

Credibility is largely a factor of people believing you will do what you say you will do.  This belief comes from a proven track record that you are reliable and can be counted on to keep your word.  If people do not believe what you say, then trust will be unachievable or impossible to recover once lost.

How to be credible:

P   Ensure your commitments are clearly understood; then keep them.
P   If you need to change a commitment, communicate the reasons for that change.
P   Whenever your commitments are not kept, repair that relationship immediately.

2.    Be Open with Your Thoughts and Feelings

We trust people who are open and honest with us.  Being open and honest basically means telling people what you think clearly and concisely.  When people do not perceive us as sincere, they tend to be distrustful of our motives.  Their energy is focused on the motives rather than on the value of the communication.

Communication Patterns that Undermine Trust:

·        Judging             ----     “You’re wrong” 

·        Being Directive ----     “You can’t do that” 

·        Superior Attitude----  “My way is best”

We each need to understand our “intended” vs. “actual” effect on others.  Behaviors such as judging, being highly directive and conveying a superior attitude cause others to feel defensive – though we may not have intended that effect, it is what was actually felt.  Such behaviors indicate a lack of respect and value for the other person.

Being open and honest carries the responsibility of sharing with others without demeaning the thoughts and ideas of others.

3.    Respect the Opinion of Others

All of us form our opinions regarding any particular situation based on our own past experiences and personal values.  Being open to the opinions of others in a non-evaluative way is important to building trust.  Although your opinion is important, listening with “hearing” is a strong message to others that you care about and respect their views.

How to Show Respect for Others’ Opinions:

P   Ask Questions:
Questions show your interest and seek clarification of comments.

P   Pay Attention:
Ensure that your body language - as well as your verbal language – convey that you are listening.

P   Summarize/Paraphrase:
Let people know you care about what they have to say by restating their ideas in your own words; it means you really listened and encourages clarification to avoid misunderstandings.

P   Be Empathetic:
People feel valued when you explore the rationale behind their opinions.

The behaviors that build trust between people are essential in creating a foundation for teamwork and high performance.  I believe that without trust, the ability for any leader or manager to be truly effective is impossible. 
The Foundation of TRUST

1. Stand by your word
2. Be open with your thoughts and feelings
3. Respect the opinion of others


Question for you:

Most of us have worked with someone we found to be untrustworthy - what was that person's effect on YOU  and YOUR behaviors?

Strong Relationships + Solid Leadership = Success for Everyone

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