Here’s the Smart Stuff About Styles - Part 1 of 2

“Treat Others As They’d Like to Be Treated” and see if you can’t make a difference in some relationships – personal OR professional. Everything this month has been leading up to this.

This is People Reading 301: Adapting to Other Styles

 

Remember: simplicity and authenticity,
not false behaviors

If You Are a strong D try these simple adaptations:

To Interact with a “D”

Be yourself.  One “D” communicates with another “D” fairly well.

To Interact with an “i”

Be a little friendlier than usual, and not quite as business-like.  You should get along easily with an “i.”

To Interact with an “S”

Slow down, present assurances, give more detail, be friendlier, give them a chance to digest facts, don’t overstress new and innovative items.

To Interact with a “C”

Present plenty of proof and facts, make sure all questions are answered, take it slower than usual, don’t be pushy or go too fast.

If You Are a strong i try these simple adaptations:

To Interact with a “D”

Don’t tell jokes or make small talk.  Stay very business-like and don’t waste time.

To Interact with an “i”

You’ll have no trouble relating, but just remember to conduct some business.

To Interact with an “S”

Don’t become overly friendly until you’ve earned trust.  Stick to facts and figures.  An “S” will enjoy some socializing and small talk, but still needs lots of basic information in order to make decisions.

To Interact with a “C”

This could be your most challenging interaction.  “C’s” are not impressed by storytelling, time-wasting, or socializing.  Give facts, figures, and proof.

 Tomorrow: Adaptations for S's and C's

 image: heidimorton.net

Can You Spot the Clues to Another Style?

Recognizing Other Styles is only important because it gives us an indicator of how to best approach someone (“treat others they’d like to be treated”) if we want to create a winning relationship.

We’ve studied Understand the Basic of Behavioral Styles which I consider People Reading 101.

People Reading 201 is Recognizing Other Styles - Link to a Bonus "Cheat Sheet" is below.

People Reading 301 is Adapting to Other Styles (tomorrow)

Here’s simple summary of signals people may give as to their preferred style - the challenge is to understand the basics in order to recognize the signs - then act on simple adaptations of your own.

D’s are:

Extroverted (though I’ve seen lots of introverted strong D’s – I think it’s believed that just because they’re dominant, D’s are extroverted – not necessarily so!)

Task Oriented
Direct
In Excesses: Impatient, aggressive
Needy for: Results/Control
The Emotion that may clue you to this style: Anger/short fuse
                     

i’s are:

Extroverted
People Oriented
Indirect
In Excesses: Undisciplined, reactive
Needy for: Acceptance, is fun-loving
The Emotion that may clue you to this style: Optimism, enthusiasm

S’s are:

Introverted
People Oriented
Indirect
In Excesses: Possessive, unsure, wishy-washy
Needy for: Trust, security
The Emotion that may clue you to this style: Non-emotional

C's are
Introverted
Task Oriented
Direct
In Excesses: Critical, stuffy, slow to make decisions
Needy for: Logic, procedures, data, to be “right”
The Emotion that may clue you to this style: Fear of criticism

Get your FREE Bonus "Cheat Sheet" here

My-Never-To-Be-Forgotten—Oft-Repeated-Very-Important-Note: Discovering your behavioral style is intended to help you understand more about your impact on and relationships with others and how you can use that information to improve or create strong and effective relationships – in your personal or professional world.

Understanding the styles of DiSC® is NOT an opportunity to stereotype and refer to someone as a “D” (or i, S or C). We all have some of each style within our range of behaviors so it’s unfair and possibility offensive to call someone by their primary style indicator. And remember that DiSC® is focusing on a particular role in your life – circumstances and situations may cause a change in that role and a change in behaviors. So can styles change? YES! No stereotyping or labeling allowed.

Resources:
The Universal Language Ô DISC, A Reference Manual, 1993, Target Training International, Ltd.

DiSC® Classic 2.0 Online Profile, Inscape Publishing, Minneapolis, MN
ProStar Coach, Performance Support Systems, Inc. Newport News, VA

My Real-World Experience – all over the place!

DiSC Research Reports

What we’ve been talking about is the high-level view of

Getting to Know Yourself…and Others™ -
A Self-Study Program in Building Stronger Relationships

The program all entrepreneurs can use to develop strong client relationships

image: clipof.com

Can Our Strengths Be Taken Too Far? Part 2 of 2

OK, I’ll admit I’m finding this is a tough project to do at this bird's eye view (by blogging) without the interaction of a classroom – covering behavior styles and learning to understand yourself and others is typically a live classroom module with loads of interaction and learning. Subtlety and levels of detail are missing here that would illuminate distinctions and fine points of different styles. (Maybe you'll have to take your own profile - there's an idea!).

I want this to have value at the high-level view and I also hope you’ll go on to explore more about yourself and others – MY GREATEST FEAR is that it will appear rote - it’s not a matter of being an automaton in your approaches and response to others, it’s learning to:

• Understand your own and others’ style for success in your business and life
• Recognize what they would most appreciate in your approach
• Then simply making a few adaptations of your own to create a winning outcome and a lasting relationship (if that’s what you’re looking for).

And it’s true that the deeper you go, the more you find in common with styles you may not have considered to be like you – we all have some (!! Almost everyone!!) of other styles in our makeup.

So let’s wrap up this segment of major characteristics of each style that I’ve been running since July 8 with the remainder of taking a strength too far - seriously overused - and creating a possible negative outcome.

S – Steadiness

As a strong S your basic fears are (and you behave in ways to negate this)

Loss of stability in relationships at home and at work

Loss of security, routine

When you go into “excess” (behaviors you may tend to overuse), you may come across to others as:

Wishy-washy, can’t make up your mind (you are slow to make decisions because you want to consider all the ramifications – for home and for work)

Avoiding dealing with a conflict situation, staying in a bad situation too long

Waiting for orders before acting

Not projecting a sense of urgency (I’ll repeat: you are slow to make decisions because you want to consider all the ramifications – for home and for work)

Too conforming

C – Conscientious

 As a strong C your basic fear is (and you behave in ways to negate this)

Criticism of your work (if others do criticize, they’d better be right!)

When you go into “excess” (behaviors you may tend to overuse), others may see you as:

Picky

Judgmental

Too critical of yourself and everyone else

Stuffy

Suffering from analysis paralysis

Remember the DiSC® model and it becomes easier to see how styles can conflict. You can see how the more action-oriented D and i get impatient with the S and C, but you can also see the value of all four strong styles working together.

But don’t worry!

After tomorrow’s QUIZ, I’ll give you simple tips for recognizing other styles quickly AND for making those simple adaptations to your own behaviors to create the winning outcome you want!

Question for you today: If you are a strong S or C, can you identify a behavior of yours that you could/should take down from “excess”?

Tomorrow: The QUIZ! What have you learned?

I’ll close today with:

My-Never-To-Be-Forgotten-Oft-Repeated-Very-Important-Note: Discovering your behavioral style is intended to help you understand more about your impact on and relationships with others and how you can use that information to improve or create strong and effective relationships – in your personal or professional world.

Understanding the styles of DiSC® is NOT an opportunity to stereotype and refer to someone as a “D” (or i, S or C). We all have some of each style within our range of behaviors so it’s unfair and possibility offensive to call someone by their primary style indicator. And remember that DiSC® is focusing on a particular role in your life – circumstances and situations may cause a change in that role and a change in behaviors. So can styles change? YES! No stereotyping or labeling allowed.

Resources:
The Universal Language Ô DISC, A Reference Manual, 1993, Target Training International, Ltd.

DiSC® Classic 2.0 Online Profile, Inscape Publishing, Minneapolis, MN
ProStar Coach, Performance Support Systems, Inc. Newport News, VA
My Real-World Experience – all over the place!
DiSC Research Reports

What we’ve been talking about is the high-level view of

 

Getting to Know Yourself…and Others™ -
A Self-Study Program in Building Stronger Relationships

This is the program all entrepreneurs can use to develop strong client relationships

Overused image: electronicsketchbook.blogspot.com

Can Our Strengths Be Taken Too Far? Part 1 of 2

It’s true that we all have great strengths that add to our successes personally and professionally. We’ve spent the postings on this blog since July 11 reviewing what those were.

But can there be too much of good thing? Sure ‘nuff! A strength taken too far can become an “excess” – just too much of a good thing.

Let’s consider the strong tendencies of the D and i in the DiSC® model.

If you’ve determined that you’re a strong D (Dominant), you know that means people see you being active, assertive, not necessarily subtle, strong-willed, possibly intimidating, aggressive, competitive, risk-taking, a fast mover, a REALLY fast mover! You persuade people by saying do it because I say so.

After all, you’re trying to get things done and produce results, aren’t’ you?

At times D behavior is driven by a basic fear (we’re back to the below-the-water-line influences on our observable actions) and will behave in ways to negate this.

D’s are often suspicious of others and don’t want:

·  Any loss of control over your own destiny or the situation
·   And you certainly don’t want to be taken advantage of.

If you’ve determined that you’re a strong i (Influencing), you know that means you show tendencies that are enthusiastic, persuasive, optimistic, people-oriented, involved with others, social, ready to work, but to enjoy it. You persuade people with excitement: let’s do it have a great time!

As with a D, i behavior is driven by a basic fear (once again the-below-the-water-line influences on our observable actions) and i's will behave in ways to negate this.

The i’s fear is rejection and loss of social approval

When a D or i is in "excess" - coming on with too much of something - consider likely reactions from the view-point of a strong S or C (Steadiness and Conscientious). They think:

Well, let's just say it! You D’s can be simply annoying! You come across as pushy, impatient, a really bad listener, no concern for necessary details, lacking in tact and diplomacy, harsh and well, domineering.

Strong i’s – you can appear to be irrationally impulsive, undisciplined, you place heart over mind, have difficulty planning and managing time, you’re inattentive to detail and go out of your way to avoid conflict and can be viewed as manipulative.

Hardy the way to win friends/clients and cultivate winning relationships, right?

That’s why Getting to Know Yourself…and Others™ begins with:

1. Understanding the Basic Styles
2. Recognizing Other Styles
3. Adapting to Other Styles

In summary, it’s just not enough to “be myself” whatever the circumstances – if I want more winning relationships, I begin with understanding, recognizing and adapting my OWN behaviors.

Coming: Too Much of a Good Thing for S and C, clues for Recognizing Other Styles and great tips for Adapting to Others

Question for you today: Can you identify a behavior of yours that you could/should take down from "excess"?

My-Never-To-Be-Forgotten-Oft-Repeated-Very-Important-Note: Discovering your behavioral style is intended to help you understand more about your impact on and relationships with others and how you can use that information to improve or create strong and effective relationships – in your personal or professional world. Understanding the styles of DiSC® is NOT an opportunity to stereotype and refer to someone as a “D” (or i, S or C). We all have some of each style within our range of behaviors so it’s unfair and possibility offensive to call someone by their primary style indicator. And remember that DiSC® is focusing on a particular role in your life – circumstances and situations may cause a change in that role and a change in behaviors. So can styles change? YES! No stereotyping or labeling allowed.   Resources: The Universal Language Ô DISC, A Reference Manual, 1993, Target Training International, Ltd. DiSC® Classic 2.0 Online Profile, Inscape Publishing, Minneapolis, MProStar Coach, Performance Support Systems, Inc. Newport News, VA My Real-World Experience – all over the place! DiSC Research Reports   What we’ve been talking about is the high-level view of Getting to Know Yourself…and Others™ - A Self-Study Program in Building Stronger Relationships This is the program all entrepreneurs can use to develop strong client relationships

Images:

Too Much - minnesota.publicradio.org
Fear faucet - maria-alqobtia-newspaper.blogspot.com

Keep-It-Calm-Don't-Rock-the-Boat S’s

DiSC Styles - we've looked at D and i, today is S...

Like strong i's, the S is people oriented. But D's drive S's crazy and vice versa! Why?

S in the DiSC model is for Steadiness - D's move way too fast and make too many changes without the thorough planning a strong S relies on. i's are so much better to work with say you strong S's.

S’s are easy-going, sincere, modest and great team players. You are terrific implementers (totally unlike D’s and i’s who hate detail).

S’s are peace-makers and people love to talk with a strong S because you’re such a good listener. 

If you have a strong S orientation in your profile, you place a huge emphasis on relationships – work, family, friends. Most of your decisions are made slowly because you’re considering the consequences for all those relationships - will this be to my family or team's advantage? Let me think about it for a while.

If I walked into your strong S office, I’d find lots of family photos to look at (D’s have lost their pictures, i’s have misplaced the camera or phone and a C would need to know you very well before they’d share photos).

 The DiSC Behaivor Model

The more pronounced your S is in the profile the harder you work to minimize conflict and get along with everyone as well as be of service.

Major characteristics of the strong S include:

• Passive
• Inactive
• Team player
• Reliable
• Relaxed
• Family oriented
• Steady (don’t rock the boat)
• Amiable
• Systematic
• Methodical
• Loyal to people and to tasks
• Trusting
• Patient
• Understanding
• Good listener
• Non-emotional - you give very little away with you facile expressions (unlike an i who shows it all on their face)
• Slow to make changes
• Complacent
• Possessive
• Non-demonstrative

The strong S’s needs-driven behaviors are due to a need for stability and security (remember those below-the water-line influences?)

As a strong S you may have these tendencies….

·    Your are team and family oriented

Responsive, patient, relaxed

Work to maintain alignment, common goals

Good listener; combined with another’s logic, you can help others work through problems

Empathic

Peacemaker

·    You are loyal

Strong emphasis on relationships

You like to maintain status quo

Minimize conflict

Trusting

·    Your are a good implementer

Logical, step-by-step thinker

Consistent, good planner

Get tasks done by cooperating with others

Are you an S in behavioral tendencies?

Keep in mind:

1.  That you may be different at home than you are in a business setting.

2.   Your predominant behavior can change based on a situation; becoming part of a family can bring out more pronounced S tendencies in some people.

Would you agree that these are famous S’s from our past?

Larry King

Mr. Rogers

Tom Brokaw
Ethel Mertz (I Love Lucy)

Frank(Dad on Everybody Loves Raymond)

Mother Theresa

Gandhi

Danny Glover (Lethal Weapon)

Andy Taylor (of Mayberry) (Sorry to see Andy Griffith leave us)

Daphne  (Frazier)

Question: What famous people can you identify as strong S? Do you have strong S’s in your life?

My Very Important Note: Discovering your behavioral style is intended to help you understand more about your impact on and relationships with others and how you can use that information to improve or create strong and effective relationships – in your personal or professional world.

Understanding the styles of DiSC® is NOT an opportunity to stereotype and refer to someone as a “D” (or i, S or C). We all have some of each style within our range of behaviors so it’s unfair and possibility offensive to call someone by their primary style indicator. And remember that DiSC® is focusing on a particular role in your life – circumstances and situations may cause a change in that role and a change in behaviors. So can styles change? YES! No stereotyping or labeling allowed.

Resources:
The Universal Language ÔDISC, A Reference Manual, 1993, Target Training International, Ltd.

DiSC® Classic 2.0 Online Profile, Inscape Publishing, Minneapolis, MN
ProStar Coach, Performance Support Systems, Inc. Newport News, VA

My Real-World Experience –all over the place!

DiSC Research Reports

Image: flickriver.com

Getting to Know Yourself…and Others™ -
A Self-Study Program in Building Stronger Relationships